September 09, 2004
The Gathering Darkness
Middle America. For as long as man can remember, this land has breathed with life. The towns, shires and hamlets of men have flourished, trade has prospered, the breadbasket of the Earth has offered up its bounty to all. Peace has reigned here, and all has been good.
But a prophecy has been portended, whispered at first in the stillness of night and later uttered more boldly in the light, which warns of a gathering dread. Evil in the form of a Dark Lord would cast its shadow throughout the lands of Middle America like a virulent contagion. First, with subtle acts of deceit and later still with unchecked power and aggression, the Dark Lord would extend his reach. Through his guiding, consuming malevolence, the fruits of the land, the hamlets and the gentle beasts would all wither and die. In his unslakeable blood-thirst, the Dark Lord would plunge all the lands in a quickening darkness.
So it has been foretold.
As the dust settles from yesterday’s revelations, my opponent speaks of a “bright future”, a time when we come to the table, break bread and bask in the warmth of our companionship and camaraderie. Our shared exploits will be the cause for much mirth and celebration. He seems to be speaking from the heart. But is this so? Or, squinting through the settling dust, can you glimpse some less wholesome purpose at work?
Yes, as the dust settles, things ahead are seen with more clarity. And it freezes me with terror. The gathering darkness is looming on the horizon. Sheathed in blood-tones, the rising sun offers no warmth. The Dark Lord has touched down in the lands to the east, and he is coming. Middle America, be watchful.
He is coming.
Posted by eric at September 9, 2004 12:56 PMNo no you're way too pessimistic. Think of it logically. You need to catch up. You have 113 days in which to do that. That's a long time. You should have no problem. Right now you're roughly 50 pounds behind. So that means you need only eat 200 grams more than I every day for the rest of the year in order to catch up. Seem simpler now? It's completely within your reach. You just have to want it enough. 200g isnt so much. That's only a burger or two.
Don't lose hope! The forces of Darkness have not yet completely surrounded you! There is an escape! You must believe! (Use the force if you have to).
Posted by: guy at September 9, 2004 02:49 PM