March 17, 2004
Old Faithful
There's a famous geyser in Yellowstone that spurts at regular intervals. So regular in fact that, for decades, one could set one's watch by it.
A Porterhouse is much like Old Faithful.
OK, OK, not every Porterhouse is the same. Sure, it comes in varying thicknesses. And yes, it is extracted from the carcasses of big steers and little heffers alike. I will admit, it can be eaten raw, as my opponent is wont to do, freshly cut from the cow; whereas sometimes it arrives on my plate, like this 7.8 oz beauty (post-cooked), only a day or two before its USDA-mandated expiration.
Under all of these diverse conditions, however, a Porterhouse is still a Porterhouse. The King of Steaks. Always dependable. Always good.
Throughout BeefStakes, I model my behavior after the Porterhouse. It delivers a solid, meaty, fearlessly excessive performance. This steak is truly a winner. Every time.
In the final analysis, with a strategy like this, how can my opponent possibly beat me? Sure, Guy logs in some impressive meals here and there, while on the road from hither to yon. But there are lapses. He has to sleep sometimes, doesn't he? And when he does, I'll be here. Hell, I'm always here. At the table. Just me and my Porterhouse. So bloody consistent that you can set your watch by it.
Posted by eric at March 17, 2004 07:03 PM